Day 29: I am grateful for my husband.
I am grateful for my husband. We got married just a little over two months ago and have been adjusting to married life. What a ride!
There is this book that I love, The Five Love Language by Gary Chapman, that discusses the primary ways in which we each love – and that if we speak different “love languages” our spouse may not be hearing that we love him or her if we are using our language and not theirs. The premise is that, even though it may be difficult to learn to speak a different “language,” love is a choice. It’s not about that warm, fuzzy feeling – it’s about the conscious choice to make our spouse feel loved because we love them. Sometimes that requires a lot of effort.
My love language (Quality Time) is hard for my husband to “speak” and we have had some disagreements lately because of miscommunication around it. Each love language also has “dialects” so what “Quality Time” feels like to me might be entirely different for someone else. But, to his credit, he has been willing to “speak” my love language, and I am so grateful for that. That is it so hard makes it actually more meaningful, because he is putting in so much effort, though it may not feel that way in the moment. That is my job, though – to keep remembering that he is trying, to focus on the effort and not demand perfection, and to listen for what the message underneath is: Love.
What is your love language? (Words of Affirmation, Acts of Service, Gifts, Quality Time, Physical Touch). You can take the assessment here.