How Outer Beauty Affects Inner Beauty and Confidence

We live in a culture where beauty is prized. Fashion magazines scream at us from every angle, beauty products line the shelves, and we lust after those who embody the beauty we desire. Somewhere along the way, beauty has become tinged with the stigma of consumerism. It’s “shallow” to focus on your looks. You “should be” focusing on what matters – love, passion in your career, your inner self. Things like that.

But beauty does matter. It matters a lot. And it’s detrimental to ignore it. Beauty recharges our soul when we are surrounded by it. And a recharged soul has more lasting battery power than a depleted one. Think about when you encounter something that is so beautiful you feel a warm glow inside you – maybe it’s the way food is presented to you in a restaurant, or a stunning sunset, or a notecard in a store that has the perfect picture on it. It doesn’t just impact you visually. It impacts you emotionally.

If beauty in the external world can impact our internal world that much, then how powerful is the impact on us when we feel we are beautiful inside ourselves? More powerful than you realize.

In a nutshell, personal beauty affects our entire lives because the way we see ourselves affects our confidence level and our confidence level affects our ability to go out there and create what we want in our lives. When a woman feels beautiful, inside and out, she is confident. And she goes for it. And magic happens.

Think about your own personal beauty, about how you feel when you wear that perfect dress that really expresses who you are, and those killer shoes. Your hair is just right, your makeup enhances the features you love most. You walk differently. You speak differently. You are more connected to your body. Yourself. And you are more connected to others. You are not hiding. Forget the warm glow — you feel on fire!

This is what I am talking about. That feeling of inner confidence that comes when a woman feels beautiful. There is nothing shallow or superficial about that. The impact runs deep and it affects her life.

When you have a high level of confidence, you are more likely to talk to people, to connect, and more opportunities will arise. You will also enjoy your day more. You know what I am talking about, because you have had those days. But it’s not about just having those days when they happen to pop up – it’s about consciously and consistently creating them.

This isn’t about whether you are textbook “beautiful” or not, either. Real beauty stems from true self-expression.  You are going to feel amazing in your outfit and in yourself if, and only if, it truly reflects who you are. You will also talk and move differently.  When you wear something that truly expresses who you are being, there is an alignment between your inner and outer world. Your clothes are a visual statement to the world of you believe yourself to be inside. There is no hiding. Maybe this is why it is scary for so many of us women to wear what we really want – we are afraid that we will be “seen as” something we don’t want to be seen as and then judged for it. And then we fear won’t belong anymore.

But think about people who seem so comfortable in themselves. They way they act, move, talk. They have a certain style about them. You are naturally drawn to them. It’s not about what you wear – whether it’s jeans, or an evening gown – but about how wearing that expresses who they are. There is something very appealing about confidence. And when you are around people who are that comfortable in themselves, you can’t help but relax a bit into yourself. They make it safer for you to be yourself. So, just think — when you express yourself, you make it safer for others to express themselves. Beauty spreads. Confidence spreads. It’s really powerful.

So, ask yourself: Are you fully expressing yourself the way you want to? Or are you holding back? Are you dressing for the so-called “roles” that you fill – the career woman, the mother, the girlfriend, the student, the nice girl, the naughty bitch.

What part of yourself are you hiding?

I find that I hide a lot. I catch myself hiding when my clothes are sweatpants and a ripped t-shirt and my hair is sticking out to the side, when what I really want to wear is a funky dress with my hair styled and bouncy. Just to be clear, there is anything wrong with wearing sweatpants as a rule, if you wear them with purpose and confidence. It’s the intention behind wearing them that matters. When I wear them, personally, it’s usually because I am being lazy, or I want to hide and not draw attention to myself. On those days, when I wear my finest ensemble of leisurely and mismatched attire to the grocery store, I find that I don’t end up talking to anyone. I literally feel like I have pressed the “mute” button and withdrawn into myself. Then, there are days when I start to reach for the sweats and stop myself and put on a cuter outfit. And guess what? I grow into the outfit emotionally and it provides a structure for me to feel more outgoing.

You know those shows where they do those makeovers? And how everyone in the audience (and you at home, too) are in suspense, waiting for the reveal because it’s so exciting? Well, there is a piece of you that greatly relates to the power of this transformation. Makeovers seem to completely transform a person. You change your outfit, your hair, your makeup and bam! Suddenly you are another person. But that’s not true. Makeovers don’t change who people are…they reveal what is already there, waiting to be expressed.

When a woman fully expresses herself, she feels beautiful.
When a woman feels beautiful, she radiates confidence.
And when she radiates confidence, she can make anything happen.