Discovering the lessons in your fear: an exercise
Fear. One of our greatest (perceived) enemies.
One of our greatest teachers and helpers.
In the center of what we fear often lies the center of what we most want: Our Truth.
To be connected deeply to who we are, to feel the feeling of the unconditional Love that we are born from.
You may fear getting close to someone and possibly having your heart broken. But what you are wanting the most is to get close to someone. To feel and experience Love.
You may fear moving to a place that really sings to you because you fear losing connection to your family and friends. Buried in that fear is your desire to stay connected. To be connected in Love. You may also fear that you will love living there too much, and to have that much happiness scares you. You desire that much happiness.
You may fear changing jobs from one you feel stuck and “secure” in to one that makes your heart sing. Your fear may say it is because you may fail and be put into an even worse financial position (your mind playing tricks on you). But underneath that fear, perhaps you are actually just wanting to share your true gifts and who you really are with the world, and to be accepted and cherished. To share your Love.
The fear of success and of being seen is that fear of stepping into and standing in our true power. As Marianne Williamson so beautifully put it, “Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us.”
We fear the shedding of our perceived identity while we yearn to be in alignment with who we truly are. This is a very human and soulful journey, this unraveling of conditioning and breaking of patterns (which, depending on your beliefs, may have challenged you for many lifetimes.)
Be patient with yourself. Send yourself Love.
The opposite of Love is not Fear. It is Indifference.
Fear is a direct portal to Love.
Here is an exercise to try to help guide you through your fears to the message underneath:
- List your fears. List at least 3.
- Then, lean in. Get curious. Snuggle up with your fear and ask what is wants to teach you, what it is you are really wanting.
- Take each “I fear” statement and transform it into what is the underlying need, the underlying portal to Love.
I fear…. –> My heart desires….
I fear being alone –> My heart desires connection / community / support / intimacy
Then, focus on connection.
It’s like your Fears are the Dragons guarding the princess (Love). Befriend your dragons. And, like in the movie Shrek, perhaps your Dragons are quite helpful and cute…and not so scary after all.
What can you learn today from your fears that will bring you one step closer to Love?
As always, post your comments below. I’d love to hear from you.
Until next time…
With light and love,
Nicole Justine Cavanaugh
Image from: http://stickyegg.com/tag/shrek/